Neglected Parkland Reclaimed for Recreation!
The City of Chicago, continuing its efforts to attract more puppetry artists and hangers-on, has leased the the former Northerly Island recreation area through 2031 to the Chicago Guild for use as a “Puppetland” 18-acre puppetry-themed lakeside miniature golf attraction.
With help from the Edna and William Nettlebauer Foundation’s (remember ‘Aunt Nettie’s Diaper Pins?’) $40 million dollar grant, CPG will create a 36-hole “golfer’s paradise,” designed by famed mini- golf course Architect Sam Dither of Kansas City, where (as Sam notes) “things have gone about as fer as they kin go!”
Friends of the Asian Carp have now reluctantly endorsed the project, after a 40 foot fiberglass “Carl the Carp” 13th hole was added. The former Meigs Field/Northerly Island site was a neglected backwater in the city’s park system, attracting outdoor concerts, Winter dog sledding, Kite Festivals, and a variety of poorly attended activities, including Chicago Bears games at a ramshackle sports facility nearby.
“Goshdarnit, this is our best shot to get some of the lakefront back to the people!” comments Dee Abbate, Operations Manager of CPG’s Recreation Division..” Let those with a better idea step up, but our 120-foot cable-stayed Golf Zombie (FAA beacons now approved) will be visible from Gary!”
Russ Simple, speaking for Friends of the Parks, notes ” This may not be the most ecologically correct solution to lakefront multi-use, but it beats the previously approved “Bareland” with skimpily clad co-eds in a perennial Hooters show.”
The Office of the Mayor expressed confidence in the Chicago Guild: “OK, it’s not the Olympics as we’d once hoped, but the MGA Tour is a Big Spender crowd, and the O’Leary cow theme is historically significant for school field trips. These puppetry folks know how to get things done!”
Will Mashie, speaking for the MGA Miniature Golf Tour, agreed: “The water obstacle to the Shedd Aquarium alone is a show-stopper! ESPN is already spinning this as the mega-event of the 2012 MGA Tour, with hotel rooms already at a premium and KOA slots filling fast.”
A June 3rd opening is planned, with Hizzoner the Mayor perhaps first to hit the hidden buzzer in Cinderella’s bust (a Par 3 on #9), setting off Tuned Air Horns that riff on “My Kind of Town!”
Full plans and a layout of corporate and individual Naming Opportunities will follow in January, when even miniature golf will sound pretty good to most of us.
